I'll Sleep When I'm Dead

A more appropriate title would have been I'll Sleep During this Movie. The gist of it is that an ex-gangster left London three years ago to escape his past, but now he has come back to find out that a mob did something to his brother that led to said brother's death. You can find the trailer here if you're interested.

This movie was simply aweful. It was so boring! I found myself fast forwarding through it to find dialogue or action. So many minutes of film were wasted on scenes of people driving or walking! And then when I finally did find some dialogue, it was painfully bad. I would be hard pressed to find a line that wasn't a cliche. It was almost laughable ... almost.

Lets talk about acting now. Yeah, didn't really happen. I used to like Clive Owen, but now I'm not so sure. He had one (count them one) facial expression during the entire movie. That's not an exaggeration.

The plot was indecipherable. I mean, I got the general idea, but the relationships between the characters were never explained. I had no idea why anyone was doing what they were doing to anyone else. And the ending was one giant, inexplicable slap in the face. Simply terrible.

To top it all off, there was a rape scene. It wasn't graphic, but it doesn't have to be - it was disturbing.

Final Grade: F "m-i-n-e-s"

Blurb: This film is horrible. Don't watch it ever, ever. It's films like these that make Uwe Boll look competent.